HOW do you share the chores in the house to make sure everyone does their bit?
For this busy mum, her husband presented her with a chores rota and found it too much.
How would you deal with the cleaning dispute?[/caption]
Taking to Mumsnet, she wrote: “My husband asked me to deal with something one week before Christmas and I said I couldn’t, I was at my max capacity mentally getting everything sorted for Christmas and our daughter’s birthday which is a week later.
“He does help but the lion share of things falls to me as I work 3 days a week.
“The task he asked me to do had no fixed deadline so I said let’s pick it up in the new year.
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“My husband got annoyed with this, told me that I’d have more to think about when we start renovating our house so I tried to explain about mental load and how it all falls to me, he didn’t get it.
“He took two tasks off my to-do list and thought that solved everything.
The real issue was that: “He’s spent the last few weeks since thinking he is doing 50% of everything but he doesn’t understand he really isn’t.
“So after another row about this he has decided we need a fixed rota on who does what, splitting everything 50/50.”
As they have two young children, she explained that:”Our two children go nursery on my days at work and have all meals there.
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“I do genuinely think he is trying to help but really, is that all he thinks is needed to run a house and parent two small children?”
The busy mum also shared the rota they had created.
Commenters offered her their advice, saying she was in the right.
One said: “Re-write the rota with all the things that really need doing, to make the point.”
Another advised: “I’d tell him that he’s missed loads off and write a list to show him! Practical things are missing but also the mental load as you said.”
A fellow parent weighed in, saying: “I’m a lone parent, so I actually made my own daily/weekly/monthly checklists and they are huge.
“He’s being a d**k!” she told her.
While one admitted: “Sorry but I genuinely couldn’t live like that …Rotas were for my student house days,” as many agreed they just did chores around the house as and when they needed doing.
Another couldn’t hold back laughter as they said: “Haha is this man for real?! It’s so hilarious that it’s not even funny.
“Write your own rota with the truth of the situation on it, and be sure to put EVERYTHING!!!!
“Love the advice to just do what’s on the rota, everything that is kept undone can be his responsibility because he missed it off the rota he insisted on writing!”
Many agreed with someone who advised her that: “This calls for some malicious compliance. Do nothing else. Let us know how it goes.”
There can be many hidden tasks that come with running a house and parenting[/caption]
The chore rota the mum shared – the top 5 tasks are his and the bottom 5 are hers[/caption]
It’s not easy dividing who does what in the household[/caption]
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